5 little words that will CHANGE YOUR LIFE!!
“It’s a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water.”
-Franklin P. Jones
Did you know that your mind is programmable, just like a computer? As a matter of fact, it is so programmable, that second to second, from minute to minute, you are constantly reprogramming your mind by what you’re saying (to yourself, AND, to others). The majority of the moments, you’ve got no idea that this is going on; let’s change that homey!
Have you ever heard of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming)? NLP is an approach to psychotherapy that became popular in the 1970′s focusing on the “connection between neurological processes (‘neuro‘), language (‘linguistic‘) and behavioral patterns that have been learned through experience (‘programming‘) that can be organized to achieve specific goals in life.”*
Simply said, our language, programs, our brain.
Author : Jacob Sokol
Right now, I’m going to share with you 5 of the most powerful words, that over the course of the last 4+ years, have RADICALLY enriched the everyday quality of my life. I trust that you will become conscious enough of what YOU are saying, to notice when you use these words. Sounds simple. Do you think you can do that? Good.
Once you start to notice how you’re speaking, I’m going to give you some tips below on how you can slightly switch what you’re saying and substitute specific ”old” words, for “new” ones, that will in-turn assist in empowering you to achieve what it is that you want in life. (You do know what you want in life right?)
Whomp, whomp, whomp, whomp, whomppp! Anyone who has ever spent a significant amount of time with me knows how REPULSED i am by this word. YUCK. When you say that you will TRY to do something, you are essentially giving yourself permission to fail. Congratulations - you’ve just set yourself up to fail from the get-go’. You lost before you began bud. If you’re really serious about tackling the task, see how you can rephrase that.
The old way: “I will TRY to loose weight.”
Your new way: “I am committed to losing weight.”
*Bonus question*: “What is the best way i can go about loosing weight?”
Aghhhhhhhh!!! Another word that has rightly been viciously stripped from the vocabulary of anyone who has EVER accomplished ANY noteworthy, innovative, achievement. Think of what Henry Ford said: “Whether you think that you can, or that you CAN’T, you are usually right.” Let’s rid ourselves of this pesky terrorist tyrant and agree to substitute it for a word more deserving of our dialog.
The old way: “I CAN’T figure out how to rid my kitchen of the Trader Joe’s organic onions’ stench.”
Your new way: “HOW i can rid my kitchen of the Trader Joe’s organic onions’ stench?”
*Bonus question*: “What’s the most efficient way that i can rid my kitchen of the Trader Joe’s organic onions’ stench?”
Hmmmmm… NEED? This little nuisance is an unsuspected suspect, a smoooooth criminal. My “buyer beware” with the word NEED, like most words, is the context. I grew up around some people saying that they NEEDED things, which to me, presupposes that they were not okay right now, AND, definitely wouldn’t be okay if they didn’t get what they “NEEDED”.
“I NEED a day off from work” (or i’ll die)…
“I NEED to get some new clothing” (or no one will accept me)…
“I NEED a newer car” (or i won’t be happy)…
AHHHHHH! Stop being so damn NEEDY! Use the word WANT instead.
The old way: “I NEED a new job.”
Your new way: “I WANT to work in a job doing something that i’m pouring with passion over.”
*Bonus question*: “How can i get paid, to do what i love?” (i looooove that question!)
Side note on NEED: i have, yes, i repeat, HAVE, started using this word again, but, only after yogi-style years of practicing abstinence towards it. I continue to meticulously monitor my use of “NEED”.
My new way: “I NEED to be consistent on my fundamentals to be where i wanna’ be in life.”
I bet you use this one waaay more than you realize. After all, EVERYONE LOVES A FAT BUT. Notice the next time you’re conversing with someone and the chit-chatter turns into a debate. In this instance, I like to step into the arena with an Aikido mindset: “Aikido is performed by blending with the motion of the attacker and redirecting the force of the attack rather than opposing it head-on.”** The next time you notice yourself being on you BUT, say “Yes, AND”. Notice how the conversation’s flow takes on a new feel. And keep in mind, no matter who they are, as Ken Wilber says: “Nobody is smart enough to be wrong all the time”.
The old way: (debating) “BUT, if i wasn’t happy with the service, i would cancel the charge on my credit card, not call in a complaint to the management.”
Your new way: (conversing) “YES, canceling the charge on my credit card could work, AND, i’d personally prefer to send a complaint to customer service.”
*Bonus question*: (in your head) ”What is the desired outcome that i’m looking for in this situation? (ex: happiness? peace? to be understood?) Then, how do i go about getting it?”
Side note on YES, AND: To drill down this terrific tidbit into my dome-piece, I personally had set my desktop wallpaper to an image of these two words for a while: “YES, and…” (Try making your own, or, you can download mine HERE.)
So to finish off the list, ima’ hitcha’ with one of my absolute all-time favorite words: YET! It is such a powerful word, and, i actually find it to be CAN’T's kryptonite. For example, if you catch yourself mid-sentence saying something along the lines of “I still CAN’T figure out how to rid my kitchen of the Trader Joe’s organic onions’ stench”, you can easily just add the word YET to the end. Voilą! The reason i want to tickle and have a pillow-fight with YET is, when you use it in the context just described, it presuppose that YOU WILL BE SUCCESSFUL doing the task you are looking to accomplish.
The old way: “I CAN’T find a job doing what i love.”
Your new way: “I CAN’T find a job doing what i love, YET!”
A bonus phrase to YET is another astounding all-time favorite of mine: “UP UNTIL NOW”. Oooooh do i LOVE this one!
*Bonus way*: “UP UNTIL NOW, i haven’t found a job doing what i love.”
If you every find yourself “stuck”,
I highly recommend paying close attention to how you are talking to yourself. Walk away from what you’re working on, exchange a couple of big-belly breaths with the universe, and notice how you can slightly switch your language to imply that you’re gonna’ succeed with what you’re working on. This is one of my secret weapons for success.
YES, AND as with almost anything in life, there are exceptions to each of these words depending on the different contexts.
More Side Noting: I’m stricter about the use of these words when in reference to myself.
Example using it toward me: “I’ll TRY to have an extraordinary life.” (Not Okay)
Example using it toward you: “TRY using these words and see how your life changes.” (Is Okay)
Last edited by Insha; 08-18-2010 at 09:14 PM.